The Dharma Room

So I've met my goal of meditating for 90 days...and....

...well, nothing's really different!    I mean I have a much greater awareness of my emotions, my place in this world, and I am able to put things into perspective much quicker than I ever used to.  I have been able to touch the divine center and experience a peace like I had never experienced before and am ever grateful for that!

What I mean by saying "nothing's really different" is that life is really still the same.  There are days of challenges and days filled with great joy.  I still cry some days, shout out in anger or laugh hysterically at other days...I just have a greater awareness and can appreciate and accept it all!  And I think that has been my greatest gift!

At the outset of this challege, I think I had some expectations that I would somehow become "enlightened" or find that I experienced the Transcendent much more often and that life would be infinitely easier...HA!  What I find is that I am learning that even in meditation, there is no end-goal.  Life is a constant unfolding of experiences and we enjoy some of them, others...not so much, but in the end we learn that it is, at its essence, a creative process.  And if we can give ourselves loving-kindness for all the "coloring outside the lines" and the rough drafts, then we can REALLY start to enjoy life for what it is...a work of art IN PROGRESS. 

I am currently reading a beautiful book entitled "Big Mind, Big Heart" by Genpo Roshi.  His message has resonated with me on a deep level and corroborates with my experience in meditation.  That we are spiritual beings choosing to have a human experience.  Meditation is not something we do in order to discard our human nature and frailties, or to escape the difficulties in life.  Meditation is a constant, joyful reminder that we are ALL of it...and its ALL GOOD.  Its a radical and peaceful acceptance of what is, which doesn't sound like much, but as someone who has tried to find acceptance of her self throughout her life by searching outside and inside, it is a weight lifted off my shoulders to finally know...I am accepted, always have been, always will be and there is immense peace in that.   Life is for learning, unfolding, discovering, changing, molding, creating...every breath is a new moment.!  

And it's as simple as that!

Love, light and peace to all,

Angie